FIRE A FIRE
Start your morning by validating an unconstitutional legal strategy! For those moments when you reasonably fear immediate, nonsensical, and thermodynamically impossible harassment, the "Let's Fire a Fire" candle is here.
This subtly scented defensive tool provides a comforting glow of taxpayer-funded PR spin. When illuminated, this candle projects an aura of total legal protection while simultaneously redacting all contradictory evidence
This candle may only be lit while in possession of a suppressed residence in a neighboring state
On-duty captain required to stand shoulder-to-shoulder for official supervision during ignition.
More details
- Soy wax
- Cotton wick
- 3.76″ × 3.13″ (95 × 79 mm) glass vessel
- Product weight: 1.2 lbs (570 g)
- Unscented, has a pleasant natural aroma
EU GPSR Product Information:
- Manufacturer contact information
- Name: Red Oak Media
- Email: red-oak-media-shop@support.fourthwall.com
- Postal address: PO Box 5696 Santa Monica, CA 90405
- Additional information: This product is made for adults. Meets the fire safety requirements. 2 year warranty in EEA and UK, established by Directive 1999/44/EC.
Size & Fit
- 3.76″ × 3.13″ (95 × 79 mm) glass vessel
- Product weight: 1.2 lbs (570 g)
Quality Guarantee & Returns
- Quality is guaranteed. If there is a print error or visible quality issue, we'll replace or refund it.
- Because the products are made to order, we do not accept general returns or sizing-related returns.
